


Nostalgia's Tale

by Its_real_for_us



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Best Friends, Bi-Curiosity, Drunkenness, F/F, Falling In Love, Heartbreak, Living Together, Post-Battle of Hogwarts, Unresolved Romantic Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:34:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27048775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Its_real_for_us/pseuds/Its_real_for_us
Summary: Ginny's mind drifted lazily into thoughts that were disjointed and vague. With her left hand, she puffed a fag. It was her fourth that day, let alone probably her second or third pack that week. She hummed, dizzied by the nicotine that coursed through her body.She watched as the smoke coloured the air around her in a transient, ever-fading grey. Ginny sighed, trying not to remember the mesh of different hues captured in her pure Atlantic eyes; the hold that never seemed to have stormy days.
Relationships: Luna Lovegood/Ginny Weasley
Comments: 4
Kudos: 38





	Nostalgia's Tale

**Author's Note:**

> Remember to kudos & comment ♡

Ginny quietly sat on the window seat she'd built in early May. It had never been her dream to have one, but she knew it had always been _hers_ ; the peculiar wise witch she adored. The one who loved watching hung-starry skies and revelled in the summer sun's warmth.

Absentmindedly, she traced patterns in the frost and dew as feathery blonde locks flashed in her memory. There was no heat-not underneath the streetlights, her fingerpads, not of any kind, at the moment. Everything was frigid and white.

Ginny's mind drifted lazily into thoughts that were disjointed and vague. With her left hand, she puffed a fag. It was her fourth that day, let alone probably her second or third pack that week. She hummed, dizzied by the nicotine that coursed through her body.

She watched as the smoke coloured the air around her in a transient, ever-fading grey. Ginny sighed, trying not to remember the mesh of different hues captured in her pure Atlantic eyes; the hold that never seemed to have stormy days. 

She'd adopted the bad Muggle habit from her thrilling, year-long adventures with Harry and Hermione. Socially, they'd shared a few back at their new cottage in Austria between trips to unknown, soon-to-be-discovered locations.

They were such a beautiful couple. Ginny had to admit it. They fit together so perfectly, it made her heart swell with want and happiness for them. Harry seemed so happy, and that's all she ever wanted for the wizard.

Ginny knew smoking wasn't good for her, and she also knew Harry almost entirely blamed himself for her adoption of the bad habit. However, the fault wasn't his to have. It was on her, only her.

She simply couldn't help her need for dopamine, the rush cigarettes brought. Even transient, in these dire times, a moment of solace was worth almost any so-called, later-in-life repercussion. She could heal her lungs-a few charms here and there. There was nothing to worry about.

Sadly, Ginny couldn't even tell if she was mourning all over again. She'd known grief before, and right now, it felt all too familiar. It was a feeling that never truly went away, one that latched onto its victims for the rest of their days. _Is that way I've potentially built this addiction to smoking?_

That's why, against what seemed to be her own will, she found herself tracing out the initials of her ex-flatmate's name-L.L. Though, after a moment, Ginny turned away.

She was determined to try to focus on anything else. Slowly, she opened The Prophet, reading about the most recent discovery of magical creatures. _Creatures._ She frowned. This had been her newspaper. _Who else would only keep the pages about magical creatures?_

Without a second thought, Ginny forced herself to drown into the words written before her eyes. No matter how hard it was to keep her mind focused, she forced herself to. She had to. She read the same page repeatedly, barely processing anything at all.

_How many times am I going to have to read this page before it sticks?_

It was only when the Gryffindor woman lifted her eyes and looked across her empty flat, did she realise just how lonely she truly was here. Ginny was scared this nostalgia of better times wouldn't ever truly fade.

In the months since Luna had moved out, it felt like all the warmth that had once been so omnipresent in this place, had leaked out from the corners, leaving only bitter coldness in its wake. In her departure, all the redhead felt was lost and hopeless.

_Where do you go when your home no longer feels like home?_

Ginny would constantly ask herself every day, hoping for an answer to the question that ate away at her. The apartment was nothing but an empty shell now, one that perfectly displayed her loneliness and despair.

It didn't matter how many countless hours Ginny spent filling her shelves with new knick-knacks, she could only remember the funny ones Luna used to grab and tease her about. _"Oh, Ginevra, look at this!"_

To be honest, after everything, Ginny still couldn't understand why she was so sad. After all, it had always been the plan. From the very start, it had been etched into stone.

One day, one of them would move out. Either Ginny would go to live with Dean, or Luna would part with Neville. They'd been discussing it since the first day they'd moved their stuff in, had talked about it over a million times.

Being flatmates was only ever supposed to be a temporary thing, just two friends living together for some time until they got their lives figured out. At least, that's how she'd forever pictured it was going to be. It's what they'd promised each other when signing the lease. _"This will be our last few months of girl time before one of us is tied up!"_

Her own words hurt more than ever now. If only, things had been so simple. Two friends sharing their youth before they'd make their way to adulthood comfortably and without regret.

_Now, there's so much regret..._

Somehow, Ginny still wasn't able to hide her melancholic regard the night Luna finally announced her soon-to-be departure. Even less, the day the blonde's face was flushed with excitement when she'd finally packed her things.

Despite her sorrow, Ginny still celebrated with Luna, congratulating her on finding a new job far away from her and their now dreadful little dwelling. She knew it was the right thing to do, to play the dutiful role of a girl's best friend as she always had.

It didn't change the pain she felt as the blonde remained so blissfully unaware. All Ginny had wanted to do was scream on the top of her lungs, but she knew it would bring no good. She had to let her friend move on.

There was no drifting from the arrangement they'd already set into motion. _I must not say anything. It's not my role to play. My role is to let her grow, to let her spread her wings, even if it means to fly far, far away from me._

Ginny remembered almost nothing of the Friday two days before Luna left. She'd consumed far too much alcohol to recall anything in much detail. Only two precise moments were crystallized in her memory to never, as long as she shall live, be forgotten.

They'd gotten so drunk on a cheap, knockoff version of Firewhiskey they'd both assumed would be less potent than the regular one. It hadn't been, and they'd laughed for what was probably hours on end.

 _"Why are we so pissed, Circe?"_ Ginny had chortled so hard, she'd had to hold her stomach tightly to put pressure against the vibrations that resonated inside her gleefully.

 _"I don't know! Why are we?"_ Luna's smile had taken full residency across her angelic face.

It wasn't until the night had fully fallen, that they'd both decided it was a good idea to go outside and look at the stars reeling above them. Laying there on a small patch of grass in the moonlight, in front of their flat, Ginny half-listened to Luna.

She laid there as the young Ravenclaw witch described how she'd thought her life would be from there on out-her one-day marriage to Neville, kids, her dream house, and everything in between. _I want her to be happy. Why can't I just focus on her words?_

It broke her to listen. So, instead, all she mostly did was stare, fixated at the ground where their hair, fiery red and golden-blonde, laid innocently tangled together. _Sunset._

As Ginny listened to Luna's innocent laughter, she couldn't help the urge that ran through her fingertips. All she wanted to do was touch her, caress the porcelain skin that begged for something so passionate and all-consuming. Something, Ginny too, desired with an ultimate, consuming fervour.

She wanted nothing more but to hold Luna in brazen, caring arms, and tell her how much she truly loved her. Ginny bit her lip between her teeth, abusing it to make sure she wouldn't falter. _"It does not do to dwell on dreams-"_

It was later on that evening, once they'd almost fallen asleep beneath the night sky, that Luna had looked up at Ginny. Their eyes a mix of lust and want, and for Ginny, what she knew to be love. Stronger than she'd ever felt it prior.

 _"I- I'm so lucky to have you. I'm going to miss you so much, Ginevra!"_ The Gryffindor had blushed wildly. Nobody called her by her full name except for Luna and old professors at Hogwarts.

_"I'll miss you, too!"_

_"Thank you for being my best friend and for supporting me through all my dreams. You're my favourite person in the whole entire world!"_ Ginny reminisced in the feeling of the Ravenclaw's arms as they tightly captured her into a hug, and, then, delicately kissed her on the mouth.

Their lips crashed together, smooth yet rugged. The warmth of them had made the redhead tear up. It had been everything Ginny had wanted for so long, and she couldn't contain her joy.

No humans' lips had been made so perfectly for hers. They were an exact match. _Circe... Luna..._ Her name rang in Ginny's ears. _You can't get attached unless you want to be broken again..._

Ginny wanted to believe it meant more than it had. Deep down, she knew it was just a drunken goodbye, nothing to ponder on about. And definitely nothing she should dream about.

From that day on, any time Ginny thought of Luna, she'd imagine their hair entangled: golden and red. _Sunset._ She'd recall their lips colliding, the memory of it all haunted her.

The sound of the blonde witch's voice strung along with her and her every waking step. Ginny had never thought anything could be more torturous than having Luna at arms reach but not being able to touch her, but this, _this_ , was.

Her absence was far harder to bear. It filled the flat, in ways that didn't make any logical sense. Even to a Ravenclaw, Ginny assumed they wouldn't.

_How can her absence be so full? Full of sadness and despair and hurt?_

Ginny couldn't even understand where her infatuation for Luna had started, drifted from friendship to love. Part of her feared it had never been 'just best mates', in her heart.

After the war, they'd just become so close, so inseparable. So many people had. The war had given many that, if nothing better to give. Closeness was, at least, something to be somewhat grateful for.

It reminded Ginny of their youth together, before Luna's mum had passed away terribly. They'd been inseparable then as well-hunting down any magical creatures they could find, playing in the creek by The Burrow, and dancing in old dresses from their mothers' Yule Ball days.

Ginny closed her eyes. She felt trapped in this flat, stuck in this web of lies she'd made for herself. She couldn't breathe like this.

She had no idea if she was into witches altogether or just Luna. It didn't matter, really. Nevertheless, it was only her she could think of. If Ginny was honest, it was only the blonde she'd ever really thought of in that way.

Even in her teenage years, Ginny had been obsessed with the idea of rekindling their friendship. At the time, she'd not thought it was more than that, but now, she was no longer ignorant to her wants.

Harry had just been a crush of sorts. Nothing compared to this. To this feeling so strong, yet so effortless, it felt like breathing and dying, all at once. _This is what they meant when they spoke of love..._

In reality, none of it mattered, not how how much Ginny loved the woman with forever golden hair, or how much it hurt her not to have her. It didn't even matter that it didn't matter.

Neville made her happy. Ginny had to respect that. That's all she ever wanted for Luna; her true happiness. And even though Ginny knew she was the love of her life, she ran away from it because she'd learned her lesson.

It was entirely better to have Luna Lovegood, than not have her, at all...

**_Fin._ **


End file.
